Here is an example of a really bad pitch. The idea is quite good. A Christmas Movie!
What's not to love??? Christmas is perennial. Christmas projects nearly always make money - and more than one studio has been built on the success of a Christmas project.
This is a case where the investors were interested, but he let it slip through his fingers because of a really, really bad pitch.
FIRST OF ALL - THIS IS A PITCH TO INVESTORS - NOT A PITCH TO BROADCASTERS OR PRODUCTION STUDIOS. (There is a BIG difference to the approach.)
So where does he go wrong?
1. He doesn't know the business. Building and running a studio is a difficult and expensive proposition. His investors know that. He would have been much better off if he'd said that he was going to outsource the project to an established studio with a track record for delivering product on time and on budget. Production is no time for the vanity of building a studio. Its about creating as good a product as possible. That's what the focus should be.
2. He appears to have no contacts or background in the animation or distribution industries. These are key. You have to know what you're doing - or at least give informed answers. In a pitch situation, you have to anticipate the questions and have the answers ready. The investors' bottom line is that they want to protect their investment and see a return on it as well.
3. The title was awkward. "Deliverance" carries a connotation that is the antithesis of a Christmas story. Be on your toes. If you make a mis-step, call it "a working title", so they know you're reasonable and open to change.
IF he had a track record - I wrote _____________. I produced ______________. I directed ____________. I animated ______________. I am a graduate of XYZ Animation School. - it would have established his credibility.
IF he had demonstrated how similar projects had provided returns on their investments, that would have gone a long way toward easing the investors' concerns.
Nice hats though.